Are you amongst the “Sandwich Generation”?  By that, I mean people who are both raising a family and also caring for an aging parent.  

If so, I expect that you’re under a great deal of anxiety from the multitude of competing demands placed upon you all the time by your loved ones - and that doesn’t even include the ones coming from your career and your company.

Do you ever consider you’re always sacrificing yourself for the other members of your family, leaving no time for yourself.  You’re constantly taking the kids to school and extracurricular activites, or taking your parents to doctors and other elder services, but you never seem to have any time to stop, relax, put your feet up, and visit with friends, watch tv, or simply rest.

In fact, even if you could find a few minutes in your day to do such things, chances are you wouldn’t do them anyway, because doing so would make you feel guilty - as if you were neglecting your duty and your responsiblity to your family.

I used to feel that way too - that I was the one who needed to surrender my time, energy and interests in order to care for the family.

Then, one night I was watching the TV show, Baywatch - an episode where one of the lifeguards had swum out underneath a jetty in very heavy seas, with the waves slapping forcefully against the posts of the pier.  The young lifeguard came to the point where he realized that the current were so strong that they were forcing him and his rescued swimmer toward a certain collision with one of those posts.

His first thought was that he should locate his body between the injured swimmer and the pilings and let his body take the brunt of whatever impact might occur.  But, then he realized that if he were to do that, he might be knocked unconscious - or otherwise, seriously harmed.  If that were to happen, the chances were very good that they would both drown.

So, he quickly came to the realization that if either of them had to get smashed against the piling, it would have to been the person he was rescuing.  He needed to remain strong, and alert, in order to ensure that they both made it to shore, and to safety.

I took a lesson from that TV show, and have since applied it to my life in both personal and work situations.  

As unlikely as it may seem, when the caregiving situation is so critical, it is vital that the caregiver remain healthy and strong.  Not many of us are faced with the lifeguard’s decision about {} to allow to be dragged into the pilings, but many of us are faced - on a daily basis - with decisions about taking time for ourselves to rest, recuperate. and in general, to loosen up from the extreme pressures of the caregiver’s days.

I recommend that you take the time necessary for yourself to keep your immune system healthy, to keep your outlook positive and your spirits bright; otherwise, you will not be helping the people you care most about, but rather, you will begin to add to the problems that are already present.

The lesson of this story is that the caregiver must be a little bit selfish when it comes to ensuring his or her mental and physical health - and ongoing ability to continue to be the family caregiver.

So, be sure to take time for yourself - and don’t feel apologetic about it when you do.

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